The piece recalls Thanksgiving memories from Army service and deployments, tracking how small acts of kindness in training and overseas mess halls humanized both trainees and leaders, reflecting on duty, family, and gratitude while voicing a Republican perspective on military culture and leadership.

My Paradoxical Soldier Thanksgivings

The dining hall at Fort Jackson, South Carolina, felt almost eerie that late November in 2003 as my platoon closed in on the end of basic training. We were a band of recruits cut off from family, pushed by drill sergeants who turned routine into a patience-testing gauntlet. I told myself each morning the mission was one day at a time, not to survive the month but to get through the next sunrise.

Boot camp was full of built-in stress meant to forge strength, courage, and teamwork, and our drill sergeants executed that mission with ruthless skill. They taught us efficiency down to a science, including the ritual of seven minutes at each meal: breakfast, lunch, and dinner. That tight timer enforced a single-minded utilitarianism—the job was to eat fast, then get back to duty—until Thanksgiving arrived and everything loosened for a moment.

I remember walking into the mess and seeing battalion leaders—company commanders, first sergeants, the command sergeant major—lined up behind the food counter in dress uniform. The same people who usually fed stress into every hour were there ladling turkey and sides with a different look in their eyes. Decorations replaced the usual blandness, scowls turned to smiles, and the stopwatch that usually ruled our lives was ignored for a day.

It hit me then that the gap between trainees and trainers wasn’t as wide as it had seemed; we were all away from home for the same reasons, though on different sides of the equation. That shared vulnerability reshaped how I saw those in charge, and it left a mark on how I understood leadership. Small gestures from people who sacrificed their own comforts mattered as much as the hard lessons they taught.

My next Thanksgiving away from home came at Camp Arifjan in southern Kuwait with the 14th Public Affairs Detachment supporting the 3rd Army forward headquarters. The insurgency to the north made the world feel fragile, but our base was sheltered from the worst of the fighting. Still, the pace of work slowed as turkey was carved and mess halls tried to recreate a taste of home for a mixed group of Americans holding the line together.

Even when far from family, that tradition of pausing to be grateful felt like something worth protecting, and it showed how diverse troops could become a makeshift family. People from different backgrounds stood side by side at the serving line, sharing the same jar of memories many of us had left stateside. Those moments proved service can be a unifier, even when national strategy looks muddled and leadership at the top is under question.

I left active duty in 2023, but the Army never quite left me. Now my eldest son is deployed, and our roles have flipped: I was the one who missed holidays while he grew up; now he is the one missing them. That role reversal sharpens the sense of continuity and sacrifice in military families, and it makes me grateful for the days when comrades and leaders made a humble holiday feel like home.

I’m skeptical of empty rhetoric that claims deployments always keep us safe, especially when military action lacks a coherent national strategy. Still, the decision to volunteer for service separates many Americans from the rest of the country, and that voluntary sacrifice deserves respect. Service attracts a mix of motives—noble, practical, and sometimes self-serving—but most who wear the uniform choose honor over cheap politics and retain that honor long after leaving active duty.

On this Thanksgiving, I’m thankful for the chance to have worn the uniform and for the memories—good and challenging—that came with it. I appreciate the veterans and leaders who chose to make small sacrifices, like serving turkey in a chow hall, so that others could feel a bit of home. Even when institutions disappoint, many individuals in uniform still live the values that once drew me to serve.

Editor’s Note: Thanks to President Trump and Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth’s leadership, the warrior ethos is coming back to America’s military.